Tuesday, October 21, 2008

A story I want put on record.

This is the story about how my darling husband almost killed himself with a bullet. But bare with me here, I swear to you, this is a funny story. This particular instance happened a number of years ago, but in the true spirit of trying to embarrass my husband, I felt the impulse to record his story here for all future generations to read.

Once upon a time, my husband, who is a hunting type fellow, decided to go out squirrel hunting (or maybe it was grouse?) . So he packed up his .22 and a couple of bullets, his pipe and some tobacco to smoke and went on his merry way.

He decided on that particular day to hunt on some property that belonged to a friend of ours. He was gone for several hours, and when he didn't shoot anything, he decided to take one last smoke and call it quits. When he was done, he put the pipe in his pocket.

Fastforward to the next day.....

My husband arose early to head to work. It was chilly that particular morning, so he grabbed his coat as he headed out the door. About halfway to work, he decided that he had better take his smoke (what a dirty nasty habit, isn't it?) So he loaded his pipe with tobacco and lit it up.

As he did, he heard a loud BANG and something hit the window. He looked down and saw his beloved pipe blown to smithereens.

Apparently, a bullet from the hunting excursion the day prior, had rolled into his pipe while it was in his pocket. And my husband unknowingly had tried to smoke it. He's lucky that he's alive. He's lucky that the bullet didn't kill anyone in traffic that day. He's lucky that he didn't get into a wreck. He's lucky that I didn't ring his little neck.

So, anyone else out there have a husband that smokes bullets and lived to tell about it? I didn't think so.

1 comment:

Ebbonified said...

Yeap.. That was me. I took heat for the rest of my tour there in MN. The guys never let me forget it.
It was a little corncob pipe that survived the blast. But I didn't use it after that for fear of lead poisoning.
As for when it actually happened, I was on HWY 61 southbound toward downtown Duluth, just before the Lake Avenue exit. I kept my cool. My first thought was really, "jeez! I should bring this up to the company that makes this tobacco!"