Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Just weary....

Friends....I need this space to just vent for a moment like this. 

Alot of people say that I'm so well put together and have my life all organized...well, right now, I'm not.  I'm weary.  We've had a great deal of sadness thrown at us in the last couple of weeks...and although most of it does not closely effect our immediate family, I am feeling weighed down by the sheer sadness of it all.

This last week has been filled with a detached retina (my dad), a dear college friend losing her spouse quite suddenly, my best friend's dad fighting stomach cancer, THIS, a friend who's daughter has a nasty stomach virus, and on top of everything else.....we are STILL waiting for order as to our next transfer. 

And as I type this, I realize that not a single item on this list of stuff do I have control over, and I guess that is where the sadness lays. I can't reattach retinas, I can't bring back my friends husband, I can't heal cancer, I cannot  comfort a sick and lonely teenager in a hospital in Florida, I can not  get rid of a stomach virus, and I can't predict the future, so I can't see where we will be stationed next.

Yeah...I know...Let go, and let God.  Try it in my shoes for a day, and I bet you can't.

So, I'm apologizing if I haven't spoken to some of  you for a few days, not being as chatty on IM, or Facebook, or the phone. I'm just weary. The truth is, I feel helpless in these situations so I'm throwing myself into projects that can make someone feel better. I'm quilting for a friend in a nursing home, making baby blankets to share, making dinners for new mothers, and pillowcases for kids in the hospital.

I'll come up for air in a few days I am sure.  But for now, I'm just weary, and coping the best I can.


Cajunrose said...

I can't imagine how hard it would be to be in your shoes. Nothing I say can make it easier. I wish Raelee were well and we would have the kids over to play to give you some rest. Maybe in the next few days. Hang in there...I'm here if you need to talk.

Jensamom23 said...

What a difficult path you are one. I am praying for you all.